The definitions stirred in me through a sermon that I read by a pastor Dallas Henry from Maine.   Some of them are his, some of them are mine… Google gets some credit and God gets all the glory.

Backfield-in-Motion– Walking out the sanctuary during the sermon to visit the restroom or water fountain.

Bench warmer - Those who do not sing, pray, work, or do anything but sit in church.

Blitz - The rush for the restaurants following the closing prayer of morning worship.

Blocking - Standing inside the church door complaining to the pastor about the sermon.

End Run- Getting out of church quickly, without speaking to any guest or fellow member.

Extra point - What you receive when you tell the preacher the sermon was too short.

Fumble - A lousy sermon or to be politically correct, maybe I should say that it was a sermon for which the pastor was insufficiently prepared.

Halftime - The period between Sunday school and worship when many choose to leave.

Illegal motion - Leaving before the altar call or the final prayer.

Instant Replay - The preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week’s illustrations.

Interference– Clipping your fingernails during the sermon.

Personal Foul– The only time you open your mouth during praise and worship is to make snide jokes about the singing abilities of the team members.

Sacked– When you think the pastor’s message applies to everybody in church but you.

Staying in the Pocket - What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the Lord’s work.

Sudden Death - What happens to the attention span of the congregation if the preacher goes "overtime."

Trap - You’re called on to pray and are asleep.

Two-minute Warning - The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather up belongings so you can go get your children.

Enjoy the game.